My middle name ought to have been “Pandora” because I sure am curious. Even if I’m almost one hundred percent certain about something, I obsess about the one minute thing that is still puzzling me. This is mostly why I sent off a sample of my spit to be analyzed by one of those genetic testing places; even though I was absolutely certain of my heritage on my father’s side, I had questions about my mother’s.

The results were thought-provoking, to say the least. I was right about my paternal lineage (Filipino), but my maternal lineage included the countries of Poland (which I already knew), Russia (which I suspected because I remember a relative having mentioned it in passing), as well as the Ukraine and Germany, which were news to me. To compound the mounting interest was that I am of Ashkenazi Jewish ancestry and am 2.9% Neanderthal. What blew my mind the list of people with whom I shared ‘something’ genetic: Eva Longoria, Luke the Evangelist, Dr. Oz, Marie Antoinette, and Jimmy Buffett (on my mother’s side) and Genghis Khan, Napoleon Bonaparte, Anderson Cooper, Stephen Colbert, and a host of presidents: John and John Quincy Adams, Thomas Jefferson, and Woodrow Wilson (on my dad’s side.) There are other notables, but I don’t want to brag 😉 As impressive as my list of “relatives” is, however, I was rather disappointed that one name did not appear on either side: Andy Rooney, the well-versed satirist who was best known for his presence on television’s “60 Minutes.” I really wished we had been cut from the same cloth.

I admire Andy Rooney because he had the knack of eloquently saying what was on everyone’s mind about everyday topics like thoughtless or stupid Christmas presents and annoying relatives. He appeared to have no filter–he was, after all, awarded the Emperor Has No Clothes award–and the older I get, the less of one I have.

For instance, if one more person interjects the phrase, “I don’t mean to be ________ (fill in the blank: rude, mean, nosey, presumptuous, a gossip, etc.), BUT …,” prior to being that very thing, I am going to explode. I really will. I’m sorry, but uttering this phrase prior to being rude, mean, nosey, presumptuous, or gossiping does NOT absolve you from being what you just said you didn’t want to be.

Here’s a novel thought: Don’t say anything. Just concentrate on keeping your mouth shut until the nasty thought passes, and pretty soon you’ll be amazed at how much more positive and pleasant the conversation becomes. We’re all human, and we all sometimes think that somehow it is our right to judge something and even go so far as to give someone else–anyone else–our opinion. But think about it. Just. Think.

Negativity is everywhere; fuel does not need to be thrown into the fire. Think before you speak. It pretty much is next-to-impossible to take back words once they’ve left your mouth.